DMV: Don't Mess VVith-the-80's?

I just had this highly amusing conversation via text message with my Madonna-loving, fashionista-friend, Jill; Who spent her morning at the one, the only, New Jersey Department of Motor Vehicle (or whatever it is that they call it these days).

J: I think everyone who works at the New Jersey MVA jumped directly out of the 80s.

Me: WTF is the MVA? The DMV?

J: Yea, that's what they call it now.

Me: Well, from what I heard, it's still 1989 in the DMV. There's a HUGE line to get into the new millennium. Take a number and have a seat.

J: This woman helping me has on a jean jacket with multi-colored velvet pieces sewn on it and high waisted acid-washed jeans with huge zippers. Oh, and a BIGASS velvet BOW in her hair. Is she for real?

Me: I don't know, that sounds pretty hot to me.

J: I tried to take a picture for you but the tiny Asian kid behind me, trying to get his permit, was on to me.

See Also: "The DMV: Parental Discretion Is Advised..."

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Hands Free - It's the Law! [PSA]

[youtube via dooce]

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The Dar(K)night...

i saw it last night. pretty damn good, i must admit, for a movie in a genre that i would normally forgo. but i'm not trying to write a review on it, no, in fact, i'd like to discuss the most obnoxious thing about going to the movies outside of ringing cell phones, crinkling candy wrappers and chit-chatters...

i've been trying since last night to come up with a witty term for them, and perhaps you already have one. (i'd appreciate you passing it on to me if you do.) it would have to be something involving shadows and/or stalkers. here's how it went down: we get to the theatre, of which there had to be 400 seats, it was huge. we grab good seats, half way up in the center. so, with sam and i and the 4 other people in the theatre, that would leave what? 394 other seats. so why, oh why, my obnoxious theatre stalkers would you sit directly in front, in back, or on either side of me? i'm not claustrophobic, but damn if i wasn't feeling like it last night. all cramped up in my seat with these people breathing down my neck, all the while there are 360 other EMPTY seats in the joint. i wanted to kill.

urban dictionary calls it the "movie theater rule:"

When going into a movie theater to choose a seat, the first seats that people look for are in empty rows, trying for as long as possible to not have to sit in the same row as another person or group of people. This is repeated until there are people in every row and then you HAVE to sit in a row with other people.
This is the movie theater rule.
This rule is often applied subconsciously with out even realising it.
I applied the movie theater rule as I chose my seat from the seats available.

well those fuckers all BROKE that rule last night.

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Don't Be So Negative...

we hear all of the new reports about how cell phone use is being thought to cause brain cancer. but why only look at the cons? here's a pro for you, you can also use them to make popcorn. that is, if you happen to have eight cell phones just laying around. my guess, is that with 8 cell phones, you could probably cook a hungryman tv dinner too.

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Don't We All Uma, Don't We All...

argh! i hate my cell phone company so much right now!

In a scene that was eerily reminiscent of the film Network, actress Uma Thurman stuck her head out her building's window and publicly vented frustrations about her cell phone company. Thurman's action inspired a man in the building across the street to yell about his frustration with his cable company's lack of HD channels, which caused the man on the floor below him to yell back that he should look into getting satellite television. As is wont to happen in New York City, the two men got into a very loud and public debate over satellite vs. cable. Thurman saw the men across yelling and yelled at them, "Hey, don't ruin my moment with a bunch of bullshit HD talk. This was about me and my issues with my phone, dingus."

i feel your pain uma, i really do. and anyone with t-mobile will also agree.
[Linked From: Defamer.com]

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Sick Of The Pope...

i know i can't speak for everyone, but i'm just going to put it out there: I AM SO SICK & TIRED OF HEARING ABOUT THE POPE. <-- LOOK! they even made a website just for this trip!

congratulations pope benney, (can i call him that?), you've been the pope for three years and you finally thought it was necessary to come to the u.s. and talk about the priest 'sex scandal' that's been out of the news for two years. way to keep on top of things.

and while we're on the subject, about 10 minutes ago on letterman, he did the top 10 list. "top 10 things overheard while the pope was in nyc."

#5- relax, the virgin megastore isn't what it sounds like.

photo courtesy of my t-mobile razor cellphone.

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