"Comes With Little Rubber Claw-Shaped Gloves."

i'm pretty sure ever blog that i read posted a comment about this yesterday, but i didn't get around to reading it until just now. the fact that it's fake doesn't really matter, because the 50 or so reviews that people took the time to write on amazon are HILARIOUS. check it out over on amazon before it's too late. (LINK HERE)

1)

Wow! So much better than playing school or house for brainwashing—-I mean, acclimatizing today's tots to the realities of the Global War on Terror. I especially appreciated the enclosed signed photo of Michael Chertoff and his letter explaining how necessary it is to start educating today's youth early with toys like these, especially as their elders just don't seem to be taking the whole thing seriously, what with posting snarky reviews on Amazon and all, and it's going to take a while to get KBR's re-education camps in Nevada up and running properly. I know my little four year-old grandson was really impressed with this set. He's now so scared it's undone a whole year of potty training and he's now wetting his pants about five times a day.

2)

I've heard that they were going to publish a coupon and code, to allow us to buy this for $9.11, they're just waiting for the economy to drop a little more then it currently is. Its a marketing thing I know... In addition they plan on offering a collectors version that will have the metal detector painted GOLD, though they'll have to use lead based paint because its cost effective. I love toys :-)

3)

I was a little disappointed when I first bought this item, because the functionality is limited. My 5 year old son pointed out that the passenger's shoes cannot be removed. Then, we placed a deadly fingernail file underneath the passenger's scarf, and neither the detector doorway nor the security wand picked it up. My son said "that's the worst security ever!". But it turned out to be okay, because when the passenger got on the Playmobil B757 and tried to hijack it, she was mobbed by a couple of other heroic passengers, who only sustained minor injuries in the scuffle, which were treated at the Playmobil Hospital.
The best thing about this product is that it teaches kids about the realities of living in a high-surveillance society. My son said he wants the Playmobil Neighborhood Surveillance System set for Christmas. I've heard that the CC TV cameras on that thing are pretty worthless in terms of quality and motion detection, so I think I'll get him the Playmobil Abu-Gharib Interrogation Set instead (it comes with a cute little memo from George Bush).

[amazon via slog]